ballad of a homosexual benjamin
by iplaydemgaems
Summary: the story of a man.
1. Chapter 1

and as mbs proclaimed in feb2013 IF YOU FAIL US WHEN WE NEED YOU MOST HOMOSEXUAL BEN THE ANONS WILL STRIKE YOU AS YOU FALL and as the nerds and others loged into steam to find it has become a more agresive form of orgin tormented by dlc login codes and drm the nerds backlashed striking a homosexual ben straight in his bucket of kernals finest and as a homosexual ben lied down in his defeat and sweat he realized the monster he has created as the nerds flocked to the next good thing THE OUYA the nerds chanted with other most praise "ALL HAIL ANDROID GAMING, ALL HAIL 2 BUTTON CONTROL" in the end 2018 ea purchased the tattered remains of steam a homosexual benjamin spent the rest of his days in the steppe of what he had created understanding his direct path of entopy to his current situation, between getting raped by ea, and ouya, he spent his final weeks scrawling on the walls these words the man at ea will tell you your games dont belong to you, the man at capcom will tell you, you owe them money for costume packs and dlc, and the man at the pirate bay will tell you games belong to everyone. i however... chose steam... and in the end it was cake.


	2. Chapter 2

a ballad of a homosexual benjamin

chapter 2

The journey home

gaben a broken tired man who is also broke (in the money sense) proceeded to go and have less money elsewhere then ea's fron lawn. much has changed since feb2013 in the future or i mean present... yeah that one ea is the second biggest publisher next to ouya and macintosh. In this apocolyptic present games like angry birds 37 red bird is bored and call of duty 28 black cops 17 (the return of lenny) are the top selling games while games like ocarina of time and left for dead 3 are long forgotton and discarded in walmart 10 dollar bins. gaben walked the empty streets of los angelas searching for something... anything a sign there was still hope... but no one was there, the entire town seemed to be devoid of life. gaben found a near by sign on the sidewalk it read " call of duty 29 modern warfare 8 (the moderner-er-ist WITH ROBOTS!) " gaben threw the sign back on the ground and waddled in the oppisite direction disgusted by society. gaben decided to take the bus because walking is terrible and he waited by the bus stop. he saw a kid of sorts hes like 11 or something i dont know. gaben said to the kid " HELLO CHILD DO NOT BE WORRY I SHALL NOT EAT YOU I HAVE MY BUCKET! " gaben then pointed to his bucket of kernals finest and smiled. the kid screamed and ran off clearly terrified of the boulder before him. gaben noticed the ipad 11 before him and picked it up, he yelled at the kid "YOU DROPED THIS AND THATS NO GOOD!" the kid was long gone. gaben anaylized the device before him unlike the ipad 2 THE MUCH IMPROVED IPAD 11 had a brighter screen and was whiter A VAST IMPROVEMENT at the cost of a 2 hour battery life. gaben wondered how such a device paired with ouya and orgin decimated his company and cherished ip's.

HOW INDEED? FIND OUT ON THE NEXT TALES OF INTERST!  



	3. Chapter 3

chapter 3

back to the past... well its the present in your time... since its in the future... so um FUTURE PAST PRESENT BACKY-NESS THING TIMEY TIME WIBBLY WOBBLY BALL OF STUFF

meanwhile in the present... i mean past... FUQ IT IM JUST SAYING DATES... meanwhile in feb 2013 a not to wise employee at valve or something who does the commands for steam chat did something that was not wise. valve employee said DERP IMA DELETE THE /ME COMMAND THAT EVERYONE LOVES FOR DAH LULZ! while alot of miles away a young ManBehindSentry known for his sexy black-ness had a terrible feeling in the back of his head *where the tumour is* he stood up and yelled KAHHHHHHHHHNNNNNN and it was loud and stuff. while a very not bright person at valve smiled content with his or her actions or maybe even a buncha people i dont know. meanwhile in feb 2018 gaben rode the bus but it was the future so it was a hover bus or something that way it could sustain his weight all of the him to love, except people didn't love him cause it was the future. gaben in or rather taking up all the space inside the bus decided it was time for him to take action HE HAD TO DIG DEEP (and for once not into his bucket of kfc... you know what he can do both at once) and find the source of his problems! gaben went to the infosphere previously known as canada and activated wikipedia. he wiki'ed steam and found that everything went downhill after some employee or more then one idk, deleted the /me command and pissed off a very sexy black man. being wise and knowledgable and junks gaben took out his time machine that he got after sitting on a scientist and set it to feb 23 2013 and had a blast... to the past!

*puts on sunglasses* YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-next time time travel and sexy black men YOU KNOW YOU WANNA READ IT! 


End file.
